I Had It All Along!

This year I can finally quit figuring and re-figuring a number in my head to see where we are at.  This month we will have lived at our current house longer than we lived at the farm, where we lived our first 18 1/2 years of married life.  A place that was so full of memories, a place we brought all six babies home to!  A place that for our oldest ones contained all of their childhood memories, for our youngest, it is just a place they hear us talk about with hardly any memories of their own. Our oldest moved to this house just one month before her high school graduation, our boys were just five and six years old.

Like just about everything else in life, there were good things and bad things about life on the farm, but over the years, the bad memories faded and they were replaced with idealized memories.  Forgotten was the living seven miles from town and all the driving that entailed when raising six kids.  No longer did I remember driving the tractor for hours on end while Mark was working in town trying to feed our eight hungry mouths!  All I remembered was the sunsets I could see from my west windows, the peace and quiet, watching it rain from the porch swing, and the countless rainbows we saw on that same swing. I remembered hearing the birds sing in the morning, the frogs croak at night, and the coyotes howling at the moon.  Heck I even missed the way our old farmhouse would shudder and rattle in the wind!  I would complain that this house was so tight you couldn't even tell what the weather was doing outside!  

I spent several years mourning the loss of those scenes and those sounds and that peace and quiet.  All I saw here was the countless trucks Mark worked on and all I heard was the traffic on the highway our house is close to.  I would daydream about how nice it would have been if we could have kept the farmhouse as a weekend getaway.  Mark always assured me that it would have been a disaster trying to keep another house, keep the grass mowed, keep it insured, keep people out of it during the week if no one lived there.  And I could see his logic, but Oh, how wonderful it would have been to get away from everything and everyone, from all the noise of this place, to just go out and sit and watch the sunset.  More and more years passed and every now and then Mark would ask if I still missed the old farm and I would answer "Yeah, I do, I miss living in the country and the peace and quiet out there."

Late in the summer, about five years ago, we got in the habit of sitting in a lawn chair as the day came to an end, visiting with each other and our son who was still at home.  I saw that I could see the sunset very well from where we were sitting, and the few trees in the way didn't take away from the view, in fact, it seemed to add to it!  Every evening we would take a glass of tea and watch the sky turn orange and pink until the big red ball dipped below the horizon.  I also loved hanging my clothes on the line outside and that summer the locust serenaded me as I hung every basket.  And then we found an old hammock at a yard sale and put it up in a couple close trees in the back yard.  Although I must admit it doesn't get laid on very often (who has time?) one Sunday morning, I laid down in it, and looking up through the pine tree above me, I watched a couple birds playing on the branches and listened to the wind gently blowing through it's needles.  The sound reminded me of what you hear when you are hiking in the Colorado mountains.  I realized I hadn't heard a single vehicle drive by all morning, all I had heard was the soft wind and the birds twittering.   "Wow Lord," I thought, "look at all the years I have wasted pining away for what was no more, when what I so desperately thought I missed was right here in front of me all along!"  

It was an eye opening moment - a "what an idiot I am" moment, and a moment that helped me see the ways I had wasted precious days of my life wishing for something different then what I already had, not seeing that God had already given me all I thought I wanted and then some.  My idealized longings of life on the farm faded into the place of realistic memories that they should have occupied all along.  And now, when Mark and I are out for a country drive, and he asks me if I still miss the farm, I can honestly answer, "Nope! Not at all!"  Now I don't see the trucks and the highway, now I see what I've got, five acres to plant a huge garden, a massive yard with big shade trees for the grandkids to play in, big enough for an impromptu football or softball game, a big clothes line to hang my clothes on, a place for my chickens and turkeys - I'd say that's just about as peaceful and quiet and country as one can get!

Four of a Kind was Just Fine!.....then Surprise!

Although I ended up with a family of four girls and two boys, I can still very much relate to the mother's of all the same sex.  For eleven years we were the parents of four daughters.  We thought our four little girls were wonderful, but I well remember the comments of others and expectation of family every time we were expecting.  I know people just didn't stop and think before they spoke, but some of the things that came out of people's mouths were downright cruel.  Here are some of the ones I remember the most:

"Oh, I'm sorry!  I bet you were trying for a boy"

"Oh Darn!  Mark needs a boy!"

"Oh, another girl?  Well, better luck next time."

"Oh, I bet Daddy was awfully disappointed"

"Another girl?  Well, maybe you guy's need to just give up."

"Poor Dad"

"I beat you, I got a boy the first time!"  (Mark just rolled his eyes at this bundle of intelligence!)

When people heard we were expecting again, they always assumed we were "trying for a boy".  Nope, we actually weren't trying for anything.  Only one baby was planned out of the six, the others just happened.  I especially remember two times.  I remember who it was, where I was at, and how we were standing.  One was in a restaurant when they looked at my precious little baby I so proudly was showing off and said, "Oh another girl, well better luck next time".  I tell you, it was like a knife in my heart!  I finally got my wits about me and said "We are very lucky this time!  The second one was in the grocery store when again, I was so proudly smiling down at my sweet baby girl, showing her off, when the person said, "I bet Daddy was awfully disappointed"  Taking a deep breath I managed to smile and say"No Daddy is awfully proud of her!"

When you have four little girls and are expecting again, you just assume that you will have another little girl.  The thought of it being something else even seems a little foreign to you.  So when #5 arrived and the doctor said, "It's a boy!", I remember having to lean up and check for myself!  And sure enough, something definitely looked different!  I had only packed a little pink dress to bring the baby home in, but the girls came to the rescue, going through our baby clothes at home and finding a little white sleeper that they cut the lace off of!  Of course we were excited to have a boy, but it was not the ultimate goal of our lives as so  many people thought.  Again, people would speak without thinking, right in front of the four big sisters.  Then we heard things like "Finally!  Now you can quit!"  or "Oh I bet your're so happy you finally got a boy!"  I was so proud that Mark always answered, "Yes we are, but no happier than we were when we had our girls!"  And man, it really blew everyone's mind when nine months later we were expecting again.  Then we heard, "Oh, Wow, I figured you guy's would be done once you finally got your boy!"

Well, that boy we got, the one that we brought home in a white sleeper with the lace cut off, and the one who along with his younger brother introduced us to a whole new set of hormones, toy guns, bows and arrows, endless ballgames, and living room wrestling matches, turns twenty five years old today.  And although he is no more special than his sisters, he still holds a special place in all of our hearts!  Happy Birthday Bryan Mark Ricke!

Fall Cucumbers

  Because of the extreme heat this summer, our cucumber harvest was virtually nill.  Still hungry for the taste of fresh picked cucumbers I looked up our state extension recommendations for planting cucumbers for a Fall harvest.  Much to my surprise, there was none!  It said cucumbers should be planted in the month of May for a July harvest, and although there was lots of other vegetables suggested to plant for Fall, the cucumber was not one of them.  I decided to ignore what they said and give it a try, All it would cost was the price of a packet of seeds.  I planted at the end of August and this is what I picked today, with many more coming on!  Sometimes you just gotta go with your heart instead of your brain!

Delivering Miss Jamie

Twenty nine years ago today, I gave birth to our youngest daughter Jamie.  Her birth was one of those where I can really impress people with my "strength" and "courage" and "stamina"!  Not the labor and delivery, but what I was doing before that point!

We were still back in our farming days and I was driving the tractor working the ground ahead of the wheat drill.  As I went around and around I started feeling those old familiar twinges and realized that we were going to have a baby that night.  It didn't seem too serious so I wasn't overly concerned.  It was back before cell phones and although the tractor I was in had a cab and a two way radio, the one Mark was driving didn't.  I knew within a few rounds I would catch up to Mark and let him know.  Then I saw Mark drive his tractor over to the corner of the field where the trucks that held the fertilizer and wheat were, he backed up and filled the drill up.  I stopped at the corner waiting on him to come back, but instead he climbed into the truck and drove off!  I couldn't follow because the cultivator I was pulling had to be manually folded up to get through the gate to go home and I dang sure didn't want to walk the three miles home so I kept working the field.  I was getting a little nervous when I fianlly saw the dust flying on the road letting me know he was on his way back, but his cousin was behind him.  I saw them both get out and start talking.  I know it was dumb, but I was embarrassed to go over and say anything in front of the cousin, so again, I kept going.  Finally he headed over.  He came up to my tractor, climbed the steps to see how I was doing and I told him.  Being it was number four, neither one of us were overly concerned.  I said I don't think I'm that close but I am going to go home and take a bath.  He said alright, he would just finish cultivating with the tractor I had been driving, because there was only about twenty minutes left, then he could bring that tractor home.  Sounded good to me.  He drove me over to the trucks, I climbed out of the tractor and into the wheat truck and drove home.

 But,once I got home and was on my feet walking around, taking a shower, getting dressed, I realized things were moving along a lot faster than I thought!  I called him on the radio to say "You better hurry home, this is a lot more serious than I thought"  Of course he had to raz me saying, "You've waited nine months, you can wait another few minutes for me to get done".  "NO MARK!" I stressed, "YOU NEED TO GET HERE!"  Of course he was already heading home full speed ahead.  Once home he took a quick shower and we headed to town.  When we got there the doctor did a quick check and said I was ready to go to the delivery room!  "Wow", I said, "I just got off the tractor thirty minutes ago"  Fifteen minutes later we met our little Jamie!

 Again, I would love to end saying something like "Yeah that was back when women were women!" or something equally as dumb, but the truth is it only shows how very easy birth came for me - but it still makes a great story!

Gateway to Joy

For years my family have teased me about my planner.  Of course, I really can't blame them.  I sometimes think I can have borderline obsessive compulsive disorder and one way it can make itself known is through my planner. I have been known to write something down that I already accomplished, just so I can check it off!  But the few times I have gotten out of the habit of using it, I found that I just "spun my wheels", feeling disorganized, disoriented and discouraged.  So, even though I get teased mercilessly about it, I continue to write down each little task I want to accomplish the next day.  There is one danger though, and that is to become too engrossed in pursuit of that little check mark!

This morning I started out my morning in my usual way, walking Mark to the shop, filling his water pitchers, looking for any tickets I needed to take to the house and so on.  Mark started walking around picking up tools and saying what a mess he had out there, how many tools he was missing and the more he talked the more stressed his voice sounded.  I helped him pick up a few things, but my main objective was getting out of there and getting back to the house to start on the "list".  I said, "Well, maybe we should get up early on Monday mornings and we could come out and clean for a couple hours each week."  Then I finally stopped and listened to that still small voice telling me he's feeling stressed today, he needs my help today.  So, I took a couple hours and helped him put up some tools, and straightened his office.  I still think the Monday idea is a good one, but when I stopped to remember that my biblical role as a wife is to be my husband's helper, I saw that he needed some help and some company right then, not several days later!

I have always loved Elisabeth Elliot www.elisabethelliot.org and her writings.  She always says that one of the ways we serve God is to "die to self" and the way we do that is to do the thing we should do instead of the thing we  want to do, (with a cheerful attitude)  It always amazes me though, when ever I do that, the thing I ought to do becomes the thing I want to do.  I actually enjoyed helping Mark clean this morning and there wasn't a single thing on my list that I would have rather been doing. Another Elisabeth quote "Anything, if offered to God, can and will become your gateway to joy"  Even something as simple and easy as cheerfully helping clean a shop, cheerfully cooking dinner, cheerfully wiping a little nose a dozen times a day, cheerfully reading the ABC library book again, cheerfully_______________ you fill in your "gateway to joy!"

DEER - not Dear!

Mark and I were just heading out to the local garage sales yesterday when we got a call from son-in-law Ryan.  They were on their way to Lexi's volleyball tournament when a deer got in their way and their old Suburban was history.  We told them to sit tight, we would be there soon.  Calls were made to locate a car trailer, Mark took off with it to bring the "Burb" home and I followed in another pickup, feeling so badly for them as we knew getting another vehicle was not in their plans.

Once we got there, along with lots of grandbaby hug's, we got the scoop on how it all went down.  Seems Ryan was talking to Karen and had glanced over at her when she instinctively put her hands across her six month pregnant tummy and loudly said "Deer!"  Ryan kept looking at her and said "What?"    "DEER!"  She yelled and he again asked "WHAT?"  He said he was worried she was going into premature labor because she kept holding her stomach yelling "Dear".  Of course by that time it was too late and when it was all said and done and the Burb had come to a halt in the ditch, Ryan looked at her and said "Oh my gosh Karen, what did I just hit!!!!!???" I guess she calmly looked at him and deadpan replied  "Deer - the same word I've been yelling at you for the last quarter mile!"

But they are a couple who don't sweat the small stuff, or even the big stuff.  Even though it sure wasn't what they would have chosen, they knew all that mattered was no one was hurt, (except the deer) any vehicle can be replaced, and Karen now has a great story to tell on Ryan. We got the Burb loaded and the kids car seats exchanged into our pickup, we headed home with the Burb and they headed off in the pickup to go vehicle hunting.  And if it ever happens again, hopefully Karen will have enough time to yell out "Large brown mammal standing in the road!"

Long Live Our Latest Fad!

My four girls and I tend to mimic each other. When one gets into something, we all do!  Calls go out about what we discovered that really works and we all have to try it.  We've gone on exercise binges together, money saving binges together, and organization binges together.  Our latest "fad", as my husband calls it, was couponing.  Stacie showed us how we could get a lot of groceries for free or a few cents using coupons and watching the sales and we were all hooked.  We scrambled around trying to find as many newspapers as possible, then spent hours upon hours cutting and organizing the coupons we had.  Preparing a shopping list, instead of a few minute ordeal, could easily turn into a couple hour ordeal.  We stuck with it a few months, but then we started realizing how much of it was pure D junk food that we were bringing home.  Slowly we realized, no matter how much we saved, this was not the way we wanted to spend our time or the way we wanted to eat.  Even though each of us have enough free toothpaste to last us the rest of our lives, no one was more glad to see that phase leave than us!  Now, on to the next one............

And that is healthy eating.  We are all learning what the healthiest most natural foods are, how to find them, how to cook them, and how to get our families to eat them.  I've told my husband that this isn't one of our fads, this one will last!  He just laughs and says "We'll see".  Who can blame him?  Heck, we all laugh at ourselves!  But..........I really think this one is a keeper.  Jamie went to whole, natural foods about a month before we did, and she was able to lose the ten pounds that have plagued her ever since her last baby.  The others are learning just how much fun they are having cooking and serving their family good, wholesome meals that they feel really good about.  Karen pretty much started this trend when she started a private group on FB about healthy eating and it just exploded with people wanting to learn also.  We have a couple people on there who are very knowledgeable and have given us loads of information.  I know I have learned some things, that are quite honestly, completely different than what doctors have told us.  Since I have a husband who is a cardiac patient, I didn't just believe everything that I saw, but having checked it out and researched it, I found that most everything new we were learning is fact.  And then I read an article by Dr. Oz, a cardiologist himself, who validated all of the things I had been questioning, like the benefits of whole dairy products and coconut oil.  I've learned that when you take all the fat out of milk and other dairy products, you are left with too high a concentration of natural sugars which interacts in a potentially harmful way with your insulin.  And that the fat in butter is a lot better for you than the fat in margarine and it has nutrients like vitamins A & D instead of just being empty calories.  And that coconut oil, once thought to be the worst possible saturated fat known to mankind is actually full of nutrients that majorly boost your immune system, and in countries that use a lot of coconuts and coconut oil there is hardly any cardiovascular disease.  BUT, the most important thing is MODERATION!  Such a hard concept to grasp on to!  But, I have found, that when I know that what I am using is high in fat, I pay attention to how much I am using and portion size whereas when I was using low or no fat, I didn't.  

 I do have to admit, eating this way does make me feel better and have more energy.  And feeding Mark whole, unprocessed foods, and paying attention to what we are eating feels a lot better than worrying about what I've been feeding him that might be clogging up that "Oh so precious" new plumbing in his heart!   So here's to our latest "fad" - may it live a long and healthy life!