Hands to be proud of

 Mark and I have been self-employed for thirty years.  He welds some, but mostly he services and repairs big trucks that work in the oilfield and I keep the books for him.  He works long, usually exhausting hours.  Keeping all the trucks that depend on him to stay on the road is something he takes very seriously.  He could probably keep three or four full time guys busy if he wanted to, but he doesn't.  Bossing around help was something he tried and didn't care for.  We do have one great part time guy whom we can depend on, and that is all the employees we care to have.  When Mark comes in at night, his clothes are always covered in dirt, grease, and crude oil.  My homemade laundry soap does a better job of getting them clean than anything else I've ever tried.

We've never come up with any homemade or store bought soap that can get his hands clean though.  He's tried every industrial strength hand cleanser on the market.  He is always apologizing to me for his dirty hands.  Especially when we go somewhere, he will scrub and scrub with soap and a brush and I have even seen him soaking them in Clorox water trying to get the stains off.  I always tell him, "Mark, I am proud of those hands!  I don't see dirty hands, I see hard working hands ".  But even telling him that over and over, I know it is still something that bothers him.

A year ago, we were checking into a hospital for him to have a heart cath, which would ultimately lead to him having a triple by-pass.  We were in an office where a darling little Asian girl was taking down all of our information.  I cringed inside when she handed him the pen to sign some papers and then said "Oh!  Your hands are so dirty!'  He shifted in his seat a little and then explained, "I know, I try  to get them clean, but with the work I do, it just doesn't happen."  She quickly said, "Oh, no!  I didn't mean it in a bad way, I, uh, well, I uh, um, well,................ I find them attractive!"  I could have reached over and hugged her on the spot!   We all laughed as she explained that she just can't stand it when a man's hands are softer and whiter than her own.

 I haven't noticed him trying to flash his hands in young women's faces these days, but I don't think he apologizes for his dirty hands quite as often as he used to.  I'll always be grateful to her for explaining her first comment and helping him see I'm not the only one who doesn't see dirty hands, but rather, masculine, hardworking hands - hands to be proud of.